I've been found! (Day 1)

A Mole’s Election Blog

January 5th, 2005

8:02PM – I know I am supposed to be ‘moleing’ the Liberals, but my buddy is a mole intern over at the Conservative war room, and he told me that Stephen Harper is going to talk about Liberal ethics tomorrow. OK, that isn’t the best ‘moleing’ I have ever seen, certainly not up to my standards (due to his constant, and I mean constant, repetition), but hey, he is an intern. I mean, he OR she is an intern… Also known as ‘molette’, but not to be confused with a female mole (which is a molee) or a mullet, which as we all know, is all about business on top and partying in the back.

No, seriously – sounds like Stephen will announce something again on “child care” or as we like to call it “a tax break dressed up as child care.” Everyone around here is looking forward to Mr. Harper interacting with children again – kind of reminds me of Keanu Reeves’ in Point Break. Makes everyone feel just a bit awkward.

Gotta run – busy day tomorrow – think I have a lead on a Scott Reid statement.

6:30PM – The Liberal Mole wants to pass on the shady information that SES is secretly reporting an 8 point Liberal lead in Ontario. Uh oh, even I am scared to tell Bob Fife this juicy info. And this is bigger than Fife. Better go straight to the top dog - Daniel Cook. Though please see the news release from Molewire –

News Release - January 5th, 2006

Bob Fife leaving CTV? Fife angry with CTV for hiring new reporter for
Countdown

Ottawa - Word has leaked from CTV headquarters in Ottawa that Ottawa
Bureau Chief Bob Fife is considering leaving CTV over an apparent slight on
Mike Duffy's Countdown on January 5th.

Eight-year-old Daniel Cook, a Gemini Award nominee and star of
television's This is Daniel Cook, was hired by CTV News to report on the Federal
Election campaign. His primary assignment will be for CTV Newsnet's Countdown with Mike Duffy.

A mole in the CTV newsroom has told CBC that Fife was not told in
Advance that Cook would be taking over the one-on-one interview role that he had thought was his. "Fife was running around the newsroom, screaming at Duffy and throwing paper clips at interns. It was a bit scary." The source did not want to be revealed for fear of recrimination.

Duffy could not be reached for comment, but apparently sent the following email to another reporter via Blackberry late last night. "I mean, what is Fife's problem? The kid is 8 for god's sake - why is he so insecure? What a baby." The email was accidentally sent to a Natural Heritage Party organizer in the Yukon named Tom Clarke - the proper destination of the email is not know.

Before joining CTV News in February of 2005, Fife was the Ottawa Bureau Chief for CanWest News Service and the National Post.

4:50PM - Headed over to the war room in Ottawa for a bit this afternoon, to catch up on planned announcements and grab some of the cheese dip that they are famous for. I usually put it on crackers, but today decided to go for some veggies. These campaigns always try my health.

Walked in on a meeting this afternoon on the environment. They were planning an event on polar ice caps, or polar bears and night caps – one of the two, I spilled some cheese dip on my notes. I am not the neatest of moles, I have to admit.

Either way, the announcement will take place somewhere in the North – I was told to order big fuzzy jackets for the plane people (that is the term we ‘insiders’ use for the people that travel with the PM). Now that I think of it, I should share some of the key lingo of the ‘war room’ so that you all know what I know.

“Rub, rub, rub – where is my grub” – a song that is sung in the war room 15 minutes before lunch and dinner arrive.

“cold cuts” – what we call dinner, only because we eat them 4 times a week.

“copy” – used both as material to be put in brochures, press releases and the like, as well as making duplicates of a product. This can be confusing at times, when you are asked to make copy – which do you do? Follow-up questions are not encouraged in the war room.

That is all for now – should give you a good feel for the dynamics of a mole’s life – and get you ready for more juicy leaks to come in the next few days.

1:12PM - Now that my identity has been somehow found out by the hounds at CTV, the least I can do is share my insight on how I think the campaign is going so far.

Let me start off with the following statement – life as a mole is not easy, and it does not pay particularly well. That being said, there is something about the cloak-and-dagger nature of this job that appeals to me. In my former life, I bootlegged rum around the Caribbean.

It’s also tough to make friends – cuz when it comes out that you were the mole…well, you know how that goes. But the travel is nice. And the people at CTV have treated me extremely well – I even got invited to their Christmas Party! Though I have to admit, having them print off a name tag with “Mole” on it was slightly embarrassing.

So welcome to my blog, and get ready for some great anecdotes, gossip, and the juicy details about Liberal policy announcements.